“Don’t tell me the moon is shining; show me the glint of light on broken glass.”
― Anton Chekhov
Hello friends,
I don't know about you but often when I read novels and short stories where there are lengthy descriptions of rooms, clothes, movements, views out of windows, landscapes, things on tables, I end up thinking "So what?" and often skip over these elements.
That's because the writer isn't making their descriptions matter. I love writing that immerses me in the worlds being created. That makes me see, feel, hear, taste and smell what the characters can. But the descriptions also have to mean something.
So how do you make your descriptions matter? There are several things to think about when writing setting descriptions, or should I say editing as this tends to happen in the polishing rather than the first draft.
Firstly, ask yourself if you are writing purely from the character's experience. If you are writing it purely as part of character in action then the descriptions automatically start to mean something as they will be imbued with your narrator's voice, viewpoint, feelings, motivations, take on the themes.
How do you layer this in?
It's about:
word choice;
what you choose to describe;
what you say about it; and
when you focus on it.
Layering it in
Layering in these elements is how you really give your writing texture and atmosphere to make your work really shine.
Look at this example, which is an extract from a tutorial in The Novel Creator Course that I designed and teach with C.M. Taylor (aka Craig). It's from Lesley Glaister’s novel, As Far As You Can Go, which is the story of an English couple, Cassie and Graham, who accept a job in Australia to try and get their lives, and their relationship, out of the rut they feel they've got stuck in. Although the Australian landscape is captured so vividly, and the claustrophobic home they find themselves living in, it is always purely as part of the characters’ experiences, rather than just descriptive writing to let the reader know where they are. It's description that matters.
These two sentences from early in the book when Cassie and Graham first arrive in Australia and are feeling overwhelmed by the alien landscape and intense heat, as well as the decision they've made to live on a remote ranch for a year with two strangers, illustrates this really well:
“The gorge appears, at last. A crack in the red earth, zigzag patterned cliffs rearing up to one side, white gums against the blue and red and startling green of the rushy grasses.”
Here you can sense their alienation, from each other and the Australian landscape, as well as how overwhelmed they feel by the situation they have got themselves in. All through Glaister's use of crack, rearing, startling, without her ever having to tell us that they are feeling these things.
What she's chosen to describe and what she says about it also foreshadows and references much of what is to come. Gorge - this hints at the problems with food obese Mara, who they are there to look after, has; as well as several food scenes in the story to come and the climax of the story (I won't reveal it!). When this scene appears shortly after Cassie and Graham arrive at the ranch, it is doing the job of setting up an atmosphere that veers between increasingly sinister and idyllic.
So those two sentences are working really, really hard!
What novels do you know of that feature descriptions that matter in this way? Do let me know in the comments below.
Descriptive writing tools
In the Novel Creator we go into great depth on the tools you can use to deliver writing that works as hard as that and look at the senses, seasons, societies and more, but I’ve summarised some of the elements we look at here:
But to write the best novel or story that you can and engage your readers in the world you've created, you need to do a lot more than the minimum.
So as you write on, think about how you can use these elements in your writing to make sure that the world you're building is not just a backdrop to the action. And always ask yourself the following questions:
If you think about all of these elements then your landscape and setting writing can shine while working with you to create the feeling you want your readers to have.
Happy writing and editing!
With love,
If you know of any writers who’d enjoy this post, please share it with them.
If you’d like to develop your craft further, then please do consider signing up for a paid subscription, which includes lots of courses to get you writing short and long-form fiction. See what’s included here.